We’ve rounded up nine of the biggest “wardrobes on wheels” ever sold in the U.S.—so massive, the pavement practically groans under their weight.
Let’s be honest: Americans love big things. Big meals, big houses, and of course, big cars. And if you think a modern Chinese crossover qualifies as a large SUV, this list will make you think again. Here are nine of the largest, heaviest “closets on wheels” ever sold in America—each one heavy enough to make the asphalt shudder.
Curb weight: 6,093 lbs (2,764 kg)
Arguably the most polarizing model in BMW’s current lineup, the XM is expected to be discontinued once its life cycle ends due to weak sales. Developed by BMW’s legendary M division, this plug-in hybrid pairs a 4.4-liter twin-turbo V8 with an electric motor for a combined 738 horsepower. But much of that power goes into moving its own 2.7-ton bulk. Even the larger X7 is lighter than this hybrid beast.
Curb weight: 6,185 lbs (2,805 kg)
The third-generation Sequoia, especially in its top Capstone trim, is Toyota’s most Americanized SUV yet. With 22-inch wheels, chrome accents, leather everywhere, and whisper-quiet comfort, this Japanese giant tips the scales at nearly three tons. Its hybrid twin-turbo V6 makes it both powerful and heavy—a true samurai in a sumo suit.
Curb weight: 6,195 lbs (2,809 kg)
The long-wheelbase Range Rover SV Autobiography weighs in at 2.8 tons. Powered by a 4.4-liter twin-turbo V8 delivering 523 hp and 553 lb-ft of torque, it’s a blend of elegance, luxury, and off-road credibility. Inside, Windsor leather seats and 13.1-inch rear entertainment screens make it feel like a rolling penthouse. The design remains unmatched—imitated by many, equaled by none.
Curb weight: 6,326 lbs (2,869 kg)
Who said going green means going light? The EQS 550 SUV, the all-electric sibling of the GLS, weighs almost three tons—about 200 pounds more than the gas-powered GLS 63. But it’s whisper-quiet, silky-smooth, and hits 60 mph in just 4.6 seconds. Even in the EV era, Mercedes engineers refuse to sacrifice comfort or luxury for the sake of weight.
Curb weight: 6,332 lbs (2,872 kg)
A direct descendant of one of America’s most aristocratic SUVs, the Grand Wagoneer L embodies the nation’s obsession with size. With its 7-inch longer wheelbase and opulent cabin, it’s the heaviest Jeep ever built. Under the hood lies a twin-turbo inline-six that struggles heroically against its own mass. Rumor has it Jeep might phase out this extended version and keep only the standard Wagoneer in production.
Curb weight: 6,930 lbs (3,143 kg)
This minimalist, boxy EV is no joke. In its Tri-Motor Max configuration, the R1S weighs over 3.1 tons yet delivers a staggering 850 horsepower. It rockets from 0 to 60 mph in just 2.9 seconds—quicker than many sports cars. It can also tow up to 11,000 pounds and haul 1,700 pounds of cargo. A true titan of the electric age proving that weight isn’t a weakness.
Curb weight: 8,157 lbs (3,700 kg)
The civilian version of the military Humvee is the very definition of “no compromise.” The final H1 Alpha came with a 6.6-liter Duramax diesel V8 producing 300 horsepower—enough to push this 4-ton tank to 60 mph in 13.5 seconds. Built for the battlefield, not the boulevard, the H1’s production ended in 2006. Turns out, daily life in a tank wasn’t for everyone.
Curb weight: 9,120 lbs (4,137 kg)
The latest evolution of Cadillac’s legendary luxury SUV is now fully electric—and heavier than ever. With dual motors delivering 750 hp and 785 lb-ft of torque in Velocity Max mode, the Escalade IQ rockets to 60 mph in 4.7 seconds despite its 4.1-ton mass. Inside, it’s pure indulgence: 16-way power leather seats, rear entertainment, and more tech than most living rooms. It burns less oil—but devours more asphalt.
Curb weight: 9,638 lbs (4,372 kg)
And here’s the undisputed heavyweight champion. The resurrected Hummer EV packs three electric motors producing 830 horsepower and insane torque figures, sprinting to 60 mph in 3.5 seconds. It can even “crab walk” diagonally. At nearly 4.5 tons, this is more than just an SUV—it’s a declaration that the electric era won’t just be green. It’ll be massive. Parking it? That’s an adventure on its own.